january: it`s the new year; i`ve been fed and watered, i`ve given and received, i`ve gurni`d, i`ve re-arranged, i`ve pondered, i`ve sat in the moment and looked forward.
and i`ve looked back at this wedding and wondered what just made it so bloody good. it wasn`t just that phoebe had walked into her ceremony 10 years after losing both her legs, one hand, the ends of all her other fingers and 50% of her eyesight. although her recovery is bloody amazing in its own right. actually – more than just amazing. it wasn`t just that ben had lost an eye with childhood cancer, but yet had more sight than most. it wasn`t just that these guys had found each other, after all the things they`d lost. not just that ben had organised a group of friends to trek kokoda and raise money for phoebes prosthetic legs. it wasn`t just the venue. it wasn`t just the bridesmaids and groomsmen and mum`s and dad`s. it wasn`t just nan. or friends and other family. it wasn`t just the tree or the red bunny. it wasn`t just anything.
what was it. why does it bring tears to my eyes. I sit and try to write a feeling.
it wasn`t just anything. it was the sum of all things. the sum of phoebe`s experiences, of ben`s experiences, of theirs together. it was open. they give everything. there is pain, determination, strength, adaption, laughter and it is shared and felt. and everyone present had shared in these experiences. helped in these experiences. it was a collective. there was an ownership, an investment made that everyone benefitted from. it`s not enough of an explanation, I know. it`s clumsy, but the feeling is vast. it`s universal. 1 person can inspire and live and bring change and when 2 people come together like that, the power is enormous.
I left this wedding feeling like a better person than when I had started and wanting to continue to be an even better person. and I had only met ben & phoebe the day before. and i can see the tears in my eyes is gratefulness.
december: some words to come with this beautiful story soon… just don`t quite know what to say at the moment. how much to tell. how much to hold back. i`m more than just a little overwhelmed by it all. not least because its the end of the year and time to reflect.